How To Keep the Candles Burning

It’s time for a quick poll. Is anyone else out there feeling any one of these? (Make a mental note of all that apply):

Exhaustion
Hopelessness
Despair for the future
Futility
All of the above

You are likely not alone, no matter which response you picked. If you are not feeling any of those emotions right now, I salute you. Continue doing what you are doing. As for the rest of you, let’s huddle up. It’s time to take stock of where we are and brainstorm a way forward. I don’t know about you, but I have had enough. Enough of feeling as though I am powerless in the face of mounting obstacles.

For me, it all started with a dream. I am standing alone on a small, deserted, rocky island in the middle of the ocean somewhere. The tide is rising all around me, the water lapping at my feet and rising up my shins. It is the middle of the night, and a massive storm is approaching. I can see the lighting strikes in the distance; the rain hasn’t hit yet, but it’s incoming. The wind is rising with a primal howl. I am standing there on the rocky beach holding a small, guttering candle up in the air, as high as I can extend it (how it stays lit in the face of the wind I can’t explain, but hey, dreams are weird most of the time). Then, as the storm starts to hit the island in earnest, I wake up. This situation seems to symbolically manifest how I have been feeling for months, if not years. I’m trying to be the light in the darkness, but the storm has a lot more power than I do, and its victory seems assured if not imminent. Does this speak to anyone else?

I’m just done; done feeling this way, done waking up from different manifestations of this dream–done with all of it. At the same time, I am hardwired not to give up. I just can’t. I keep trying to raise the candle a little higher, or protect it, or find higher ground, or find shelter from the storm somewhere. So what do those actions look like outside of the dream? What can I do in real life to mitigate the effects of the encroaching storm?

I am reminded of the story of the Trojan princess Cassandra from Greek mythology. Endowed with the ability to see the future by the god Apollo, she is also cursed by the fact that even though she can see everyone’s future, even their means and moments of death, no one believes her. Now, I am no oracle or prophet of any kind, but I do work to keep myself as informed as I can as to what is happening in the world around me, and I do at times feel like I see things that many around me do not. Maybe they are choosing not to see it, or see the situation differently from me. At the same time, any attempts to engage others in conversation as to how we can work to address some of the challenges I see us facing is often met with blank stares or outright downplaying of the seriousness of the situation.

I work with young people every day. They are quite literally the future of our civilization, which is what has me nervous. After 33 years of the same work, the last eight or so have been…different. The children are different. They do not, or in some cases cannot, read. They can decode, or turn letters and words into sound, but if asked to explain the meaning of what they have “read,” I get the Gen Z stare. Their attention spans have been remarkably reduced. They can’t listen to something or sustain their concentration on a written passage for more than a minute or two. Their brains are actually being transformed, losing the physical capacity to sustain focus on anything for a meaningful length of time. Our hyper-digitized, video-based culture is stealing from them the ability to pay attention to something complex long enough to make meaningful sense of it. As a result, they struggle to write or speak about anything beyond the most superficial of levels. The worst part of all of it is that they seem fully aware of this phenomenon…they just don’t seem to care. They’re fine with it. They are all just going to be influencers, go viral immediately, get famous, and live the life of their wildest dreams. Who needs to know how to read, write, or communicate in order to do that? They just need the likes.

Now, is that hyperbole? Perhaps a little. There are those among them who do genuinely seem to care about their futures and do give their best efforts, it’s just that they are now in the minority. They are the exceptions to the norm, where just over a decade ago, they were the majority, with the unengaged being the outliers on the fringe. There are any number of causes we can turn to in an attempt to explain what has happened: social media, smartphone access at too young an age…the list goes on. Whatever caused it, the problem is here, and I go in to face it on a daily basis, working to summon the energy and self-discipline to keep holding the candle up against the storm. Will it matter in the end? It has to…somehow, it has to.

So, my intent here is not to go on a doom-scrolling rant about how futile it is to stand against these societal forces over which we have as individuals very little control. What is the point of that? Like I said, I’m done. I’m done focusing on the negative. That happens to be what is driving the algorithms dictating what so many people see for hours every day–outrage, negativity, and the seeming futility of hope. No more. I am sure that each of you reading this experience this phenomenon in a very specific and individualized way in your daily lives. What gives me some hope is that you are reading this at all; there are still some people out there working on improving their spiritual selves. You haven’t capitulated to the forces of the storm. You’re still candles. So, what can we candles do to keep the light alive? Let’s take a look.

First, we can work to shut it all out, or at least as much of it as we can. If you can’t eliminate your social media presence or use entirely, you can work to limit it by setting specific time limits. You can also avoid random scrolling through algorithm-controlled feeds that try to serve up the worst the internet has to offer and get you to bite. The forces behind these devices and what they design are very good at what they do. They know how to hijack your limbic system, how to trigger the release of dopamine in just the right amounts and at the right times to harness your attention, all day if they can. Resist the randomness. Find some podcasts, created by individuals you trust who really know their business–experts in their fields. Then, once you have a selection of them at hand, pick an episode, set a timer, and immerse yourself in it. Perhaps listen to it in the car on the way to work, or as I do, during breakfast before even heading off to work. Rotate episodes each day. Just stay focused on good information from informed people, not random opinions of those who have agendas incompatible with your own. There are inspirational people out there who have great stories and messages that can help keep that candle burning in you and make you feel like you are not alone, even if you don’t personally know them. The key is staying focused on the right kind of content, the kind that feeds and supports your spiritual and professional journey, while screening the noise out–the noise that drives the outrage. Seek not noise, but music–the music of focus and purpose, the music of inspiration and hope.

Second, we can read. I teach English, so my whole career has been centered around reading and trying to get others to see its benefits. Read everything you can get your hands on, particularly works of quality. I’m not talking about random social media posts here, or memes. I mean works of classical literature, works of well-researched non-fiction written by strongly-credentialed historians and professionals, essays and columns by experts who have earned respect in their fields. We need to once again value genuine, earned expertise over unsupported opinion. We need to ground ourselves in a shared truth so that we can work to address the challenges we face with a common understanding of the causes of them. We can’t live in individualized, algorithmic echo chambers where truth becomes relative. We have to stay genuinely informed about what is going on around us. This takes careful curation of what we read, working to absorb as many different viewpoints as we can on the issues we face and critically analyzing them in search of flaws or misinterpretations. This takes concentration. There are a lot of sources out there that are very adept in rhetorical trickery, distraction, and ways to shield us from the real truth. To cut through that will require the restoration of our attention spans and ability to really analyze what is being said and how.

Thirdly, we need to learn to listen again. I have sometimes been approached by students who wish to start something like a debate club. I respectfully decline when this happens. I think discussing our challenges together is important, but “debate” often leaves a bad taste in my mouth, as the object seems to be to “win,” as opposed to genuinely engaging in discussions that might help us address our shared challenges. If one side of a debate must win, then my necessity in such a design, one must lose. Why must anyone lose when the challenges we are facing affect all of us? Why is it that we are often incapable of putting intelligent, passionate people with great ideas into a room, putting all possible strategies to deal with a challenge out on a table, and discussing, in a civil manner, the pros and cons of each, throwing out those approaches that have failed in the past and pursuing those that look like they have the best chance of succeeding? Such an approach would require so many of the attributes that I see us losing: patience, open-mindedness, willingness to compromise, and empathy. However, the results of conversations like this would be lasting, meaningful solutions that would have support across the spectrum, as everyone involved in the generation of those solutions felt heard. Then, if an idea didn’t work, we could go back to the drawing board with goodwill and a sense of purpose, knowing that those we are working with all have the same goal in mind: solutions that are best for everyone. Everyone wins then, because we actually listened to one another.

Lastly, we can make time to step away from it all and take care of ourselves. What is it that gives you joy? Double down on it. A restful, relaxing hobby; time with those you love; walks in nature; meditation. Activities that nurture your spirit and help to re-energize you to get up and face another day are absolutely necessary to keep your candle burning. Get adequate sleep. Eat wholesome, nutritious food that is minimally processed. Exercise to keep your body feeling energized and strong. Too often we neglect these aspects of our lives, underestimating their “under the radar” importance. If we are too fatigued to meaningfully engage in the other candle-sustaining activities listed here, then the candle will go out before we can hold it up.

This is of course not an all inclusive list. Each of you could add to it with your own means of keeping your candles alight and held high. The important thing is that we stand before that storm and continue to hold our arms high, no matter how strong the winds, how forceful the rain, or how high the tide rises. There simply isn’t any other choice. I refuse to let the light go out. I know those reading this feel the same. If we can hold our candles up, then the collective light will, one day, beat back the storm.

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SNS strives to include diverse voices within the spectrum of naturalistic spirituality. Authors will vary in their opinions, terms, and outlook. The views of no single author therefore necessarily reflect those of all Spiritual Naturalists or of SNS.
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